Crash and burn, hitting bottom, running out of space, emotionally and physically landing at the permanent state of pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. A heroin addict overdosing lying on a gurney in an ICU. A drunk driver coming out of a blackout to glaring lights, sirens, and an airbag in his face after hitting a car while driving in the wrong lane. A gambling addict tapping out his 401k, A.T.M. and having his car repossessed while avoiding a lone shark who wants to break his knees. That’s what it looks like! We have seen it all before.

Sandra Bullock knocking over her sister’s wedding cake drunk in “28 days.” Michael Keaton collapsing as his cocaine use spirals out of control in “Clean and Sober” and Ewan McGregor in the 1996 English classic “Trainspotting” boarding himself up in his room to try to detox. We know what it looks like. But what about Sex and Love addiction? What does that look like?

Ramy is an American comedy-drama web television series which premiered on April 19, 2019 on Hulu. In May 2019, Hulu renewed the series for a second season which is premiered on May 29, 2020. The series stars Ramy Youssef as the titular character with Mahershala Ali joining the cast in a recurring role for season 2. The series has been praised for its portrayal of American Muslims as well as Arab Americans when most Western pop culture depictions are “usually as the bad guys”.

Truth be told you could set this show in any ethnic arena or in white bread middle American and see the same result. As much as it is a American Muslim story it is as much a human being story. Ramy follows “a first-generation American Muslim who is on a spiritual journey in his politically divided New Jersey neighborhood. It explores the challenges of what it is like being caught between an Egyptian community that thinks life is a moral test, and a generation that thinks life has no consequences.” All against the back drop of sex, drugs and Rock & Roll!

In the twenty years of No More Secrets (NMS) we have had Evangelical Christian, Orthodox Jews, devote Catholics, members of the Church of the Latter-Day Saints, Buddhists, Hindus and Muslims and what I have learned is that this illness can not be prayed away and yet the essence of any 12 step program is spirituality. Seven of the 12 steps have to do with a Higher Power, a God of your understanding.

Without giving too much of the show away it was easy for me to see where it was going. As much as he tried to find himself, his narcissistic personality tendencies driven by his shame and guilt, fueled by his sex and love behavior led him to a crash and burn moment.  As season 2 ended, I can only hope that if there is a season 3, he will end up getting in our rooms. God willing or as they say in Arabic شَاءَ ٱللَّٰهُ‎, insha’Allah.

If the shelter in place of Covid19 is bringing your need for help to light just remember that there is a way out.

Remember, misery is optional.

Contact me. I’m here for you.