Shrinking is an Apple TV comedy drama series about a therapist, Jimmy Laird who is played by Jason Siegel, who begins breaking therapeutic protocol and telling his patience what he really thinks about them after the sudden death of his wife while also dealing with his own denial-based grief and his obtuse relationship with his lost teenage daughter. The series explores themes of grief therapy, trauma, community building, and personal growth.
I’ve been known to say when talking about addiction that a root cause is isolation combined with Adverse Childhood Experiences. This show as it unfolds against the backdrop of the sudden death of a much-beloved prime of life wife, mother, and friend whose sudden and untimely demise created a void that catapulted a cast of characters to ultimately create a “WE,” much in the same manner those in early recovery living in a sober transitional housing settings are forced to create a nontraditional family setting. In “Recovery Speak” that translates to
THE OPPOSITE OF ADDICTION IS NOT SOBRIETY-
THE OPPOSITE OF ADDICTION IS CONNECTION!
ADDICTS ARE A COMMUNITY OF ONE,
“WE” ARE A RECOVERY COMMUNITY OF MANY.
The same is true for almost any human destabilizing emotional experience not just addiction.
Diseases of despair are a trio of behaviors—drug overdose, alcoholism, and suicide—that lead to premature death, often driven by long-term economic decline, social isolation, and low educational attainment. These conditions disproportionately affect working-class individuals and, by 2021, became the fifth leading cause of death in the US.
Often times this silent assassin is missed diagnosed or trivialized by others. Sadly, this is a treatable illness.
Like the lead character in the show, my life had a life changing moment of clarity in time back in 1991 that offered me by definition a growth opportunity to change and to create a “WE.” As a result, today I am blessed with a huge cadre of men and women to support me as life divinely unfolds, warts and all.
During my almost 29 years here in Seattle that contains a wide variety of experiences including but not limited to getting a divorce, death of a parent, going into private practice, getting re-married, raising two children, building a recovery community, writing a book, having cancer surgery and treatment, traveling internationally, becoming a grandparent, retirement and now bearing witness to my brothers Alzheimer’s. And in the end, I couldn’t have imagined getting through all this without a “WE.”
On March 6th, I celebrated three years cancer free. On March 9th I celebrated 35 years in recovery and had a chance to share my experience, strength and hope at a speaker meeting. And to put a cherry on the top of the cake, on the 14th of March, I celebrated 77 years of life and blessings.
I was once described as a wounded healer. I welcome the label.
My prayer is simple, it’s from the basic text of Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous on page 195:
“Thank you, God, for what you’ve given me — for what you’ve taken away — and what you have left behind.”
Don’t leave before the miracle and we are all miracles.
Misery is optional.
NO MORE SECRETS 