For almost ten years No More Secrets has hosted a men’s pot luck movie night in the last week of February, April, June, August and October. Five times a year we come together to break bread, visit with each other and watch a Hollywood movie that I choose but never divulge beforehand. The movie night goal, like all of our other NMS social events, is to reduce shame and increase intimacy among the men. Last week was our 48th movie night.
The highlight for me is the practice of introducing each other. Each man gets to say how long he has been in NMS, what group he is in or was in if he is an alumnus, who is his sponsor, and any sponsee(s) he might have. Like always it was very important to the four newbies to see the connectivity between all the men in the room. On this movie night we had six generations of sponsors/sponsees in the room. It was a powerful testimonial to the NMS model. Like always the four new men looked like deer caught in the head light.
The movie I chose was an American film classic from 1966. This black and white film featured two of the greatest film legends of all time and even though the theme was centered around alcoholism, the insanity that was so powerfully portrayed fit sex and love addicts to a tee. The movie was Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolf?, starring Richard Burton and Liz Taylor. She won the Oscar that year for Best Female Performance.
The irony of the movie was that at the time of the filming Liz and Dick were married and Hollywood royalty, much like Brad and Angelina are today. Shortly after the end of filming Richard Burton was quoted as saying that he was emotionally lost while Liz was saying that she was tired of playing “Martha” in real life. Sadly within the next two years they were divorced and in eight years he was dead from alcoholism. Life imitating art?
The men were emotionally spent by the end of the movie. The feedback and discussion was as always fascinating just by the fact of having 25 sets of eyes on it. The best part was that they all could relate, even the men who don’t drink. It was another successful Movie Night, and a little bit more shame got left on the rug.